Get ready for the most uncomfortable introduction to a car review ever. It's a new Regular Cars review for the 1983 Citroen 2CV, the vehicle meant to inspire farmers to give up horses for weak, so weak, cars.
But, man, after looking at this gear box and listening to a vulgar jet-lagged man spend a quarter of his video explaining it, shifting back to horses seems like making a trade up to a Rolls Royce.
The 2CV is so painfully self-aware that it comes across as charming. Its simple engine, meek performance, and "roof" all combine to make it feel like Nigel Thornberry crossed paths with that witch from The Holy Grail, only on a day where she decided newts were sooooooo 1162 and turned him into a weird little French car instead.
Seriously, this car is so French it spits on pedestrians when it says "croissant."
It's amazing; the 2CV deserves to be loved. Just please, dear god, don't ever put this on a U.S. interstate, or do, who cares? We're all going to die one day.